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I need some help OTB chess psychology.

#1
TL;DR
I have been throwing crushing positions against higher rated players about 50-75% of the time then tilting in the following game(s).

Well its been about 2-3 weeks since my last OTB tournaments, and I did not do great to say the least. I ended up losing 50 fide ELO points over my last two events, and I feel like the reason is the fact I tilted horribly after throwing an early game against a ( much ) higher rated player in the next game against a lower rated player in each tournament ( keep in mind these were rapid events and the games were pretty long so I had little recovery time before the next game ) . during the games against higher rated players, I ended up getting a crushing position and with sufficient time to convert, but not so much time that I could relax. I feared that if I spent too much time in the current position I wouldn't have enough time to convert the advantage, I still would, even 10 seconds would be enough to convert the resulting position, I had 3 minutes, nothing but fear/nervousness. As a result I missed A embarrassingly simple move In each game, and the eval suddenly inverted colors. The 2 games were against an +253 points my rating, an 1830, and +868(!) my rating, GM Swayams Mishra ( @ mr_bh6 on lichess ). There are also countless examples in classical games where I have a good position but for some reason I play too fast and blunder something, which I wont go into, this post is long enough as is.
#2
If you like, we can talk via personal messages about it. To contact you, is not possible, messages are blocked, so ... if interested, you write to me ... :))
#3
@Akarsh_2010 said in #1:
> TL;DR
> I have been throwing crushing positions against higher rated players about 50-75% of the time then tilting in the following game(s)

Sounds like you're expecting to throw the games , so you do , have faith and confidence you can convert rather than thinking to yourself I bet I blow this! Maybe thoughts other than the game in hand are entering your head.
Tunnel syndrome I call it ( man Utd beating Accrington Stanley in the tunnel, before a ball been kicked) getting beat just because they're higher rated
#4
@Anna_Flower said in #2:
> If you like, we can talk via personal messages about it. To contact you, is not possible, messages are blocked, so ... if interested, you write to me ... :))
You can give advice here in the forum too, that way others with the same/similar problem may be able to take some tips as well without needing to make another forum. I will PM you in case you are not willing to post advice Publicly.

@SimonBirch said in #3:
> Sounds like you're expecting to throw the games , so you do , have faith and confidence you can convert rather than thinking to yourself I bet I blow this!
possibly.. but it feels like the positions I am throwing seem un-throw-able at first glance. It never feels like I lack the skills/confidence to convert the position. But somehow whenever I throw games I miss one resource the opponent has. May be as simple as one move.

take this game, against the GM

I simply had to play fxg5 and white has no moves, I play Ra1 Rbb1 Rxc1 and I win. well I thought there is no difference between fxg5 Ra1 Rbb1 and Ra1 Rbb1 other than Ra1 Rbb1 being faster. well there is one massive difference which I missed. f7+! Kf8 Bh6+! and after he makes a queen I simply lose.
#5
@SimonBirch said in #3:
> Maybe thoughts other than the game in hand are entering your head.
> Tunnel syndrome I call it ( man Utd beating Accrington Stanley in the tunnel, before a ball been kicked) getting beat just because they're higher rated
Again yes, I have mentioned in the OG post that I worried about getting low on time for no reason, a thought which has never happened to me against lower/similar rated players.
#9
Hi @Akarsh_2010 , when i saw the critical position in your match against the GM one thing directly came into my mind:

The current problem you face may be the concequence of "schematic thinking" (which sometimes may distract you from several tactical consequences) instead of responding according to what is actually happening on the board and what needs to be done.

Stronger players are not only stronger because of their calculation skills, but also because they understand the position better.

In your case the pawn on g4 with the combination of bishop and queen are extremely dangerous (as you had to discover painfully). A strong player sees this and limits their calcuation to a minimum, focussing on the important parts of the board (which you did not in this case). The GM spotted this ressource immediately (sensing, that the pawn promotes on a dark square and the dark-squared bishop helping on its way to f8).

I often annoy my coach by making moves, that look good but miss the point in the position, so i'm working on that topic, too.

A book like Jeremy Silmann's "The Amateurs Mind" and "How to reassess your chess (4th edition)" could be a good buy/study.

Bye and good luck on your lifelong chess journey!
#10
@Ben10Tenyson said in #8:
> Pretty sure this is just a calculation oversight
One which I feel like I wouldn't miss if I had not been playing a GM, or had just calmed myself down, and looked for the idea of h4 hg5 gf6 f7+.